I’ve always been fascinated by dominos. I used to watch those big competitions where people would line up hundreds of dominos in unique patterns and then they would set the first domino in motion and one by one, they fell. There is even something cool about the sound dominos make when they go town. It’s a rhythm. I can hear it in my head even now. I think what intrigues me the most is how everything has to be lined up just right—certain angle, certain width and more—to make sure the motion doesn’t stop. Even a slight miscalculation can stop the flow.

Why am I bringing this up, why does it matter?

I’m so glad you asked. The concept of dominos came up recently when working with a client. The client was describing the “perfect storm” of emotions they were experiencing—it was as if, one by one, another emotion, another “falling apart” of something else in the client’s life would occur. And then, with a light bulb moment, the client said, “it’s like dominos.” 

Once one bad experience or emotion started happening, it just kept going and going and going. We started exploring this with each domino representing an emotion. We got clarity around which emotions tended to have the strongest force and where they were being placed in the domino chain. We then explored what could be done to interrupt the chain of dominos—even looking at one of the dominos a different way (reframing). We accomplished that by turning a domino sideways for perspective. By the time we got done, the client had new insights around processing emotions, reframing situations, and stopping the “usual” trail of emotional spiraling. And then there was the NEW thought:

If this domino concept works for these negative emotions, could it work for the positive thoughts? Could I create a pattern of positive thought after positive thought?

“Let’s test out the theory,” I said. So we created a domino space with each domino labeled as positive thoughts or experiences that had happened for the client. The client noticed that the momentum built with this positive energy actually shifted the way they wanted to put the dominos together. I invited the client to notice the patterns, the spacing, the emotions and more. We then took a moment to explore what would happen if a negative thought started creeping in. It didn’t take long for the client to see how the energy would shift and it was as if there was a different perspective on the domino.

Oh wow, the client said, it’s just like the first time we did it, but in reverse. 

Yes, I said, it is similar, and yet, what do you know now that will serve you well moving forward?

The client paused and then shared this wisdom:

1. Emotions can build on one another. 
2. If I am experiencing a negative emotion, I can choose to look at different perspectives around that emotion to gain new insight and choose to move towards a new direction.
3. When I am experiencing positive emotions and thoughts, I can keep building on them and gain momentum. If I notice something getting in the path, I can use my positive experiences to help me move past it.
4. Just moving the experience from playing out in my head to using a set of dominos has already helped. I’m not overthinking it anymore. 
5. I have another new tool in my toolbox to work through my own emotions and thought processes.

Friends: we are all on a journey every day. Our thoughts, experiences, memories and more affect this journey. I hope one client’s experience will help serve you on your journey. 

I’m curious what you’ve found useful about this. I’m also curious if you have another game that may have similar learning possibilities. I’d love to hear about it!

Keep SHINING in Your Brilliance!